“I’m just not a warm and fuzzy kind of guy,” said one of my most successful clients during a virtual session last week. Remembering our first session together about a year ago when he said, “Let’s spend no more than four to five minutes on getting to know you chitchat, and then let’s get down to business,” I wasn’t about to disagree with him.
This client—let’s call him Yohan—was lamenting how his entire team appeared to be distracted by COVID-19. He went so far as to say that his team was being needy and that he was afraid he was out of his league, “because I don’t do needy.” I admired him for recognizing that this was new territory for him as a leader and that he was ill-equipped for this crisis (not a lot unlike most of the world).
Yohan is the kind of leader who sets crystal clear expectations—that happen to be particularly high—and he won’t stand for less. He moves on swiftly from those who can’t deliver and generously rewards those who do. The team is consequently full of high performers who are proud to be there, proud to win—a lot and often—and proud to work for Yohan who won’t give them a hug (not even a virtual one) but will give them unfiltered feedback in the spirit of helping them get even better. Yohan uses his style to his advantage, and it has worked well for him, until now.
What is a not-so-warm leader to do in a time that requires a little more warmth and fuzz?
We often take our clients through an exercise that has them identify where they find themselves on this chart, looking at the relationship between being results-focused and warmth-focused:
What does it mean to provide your team with more support during a global pandemic? As a leader, how can you warm up?
Spend more than a few minutes checking in with people to ask—and then actually listen to—how they are doing. How their kids are doing. What they might be worried about. This matters now more than ever. People need to feel like their emotional needs are met before they can get down to business.
Over communicate. Let people know about the latest decisions and even the latest indecisions. Some leaders are sending out nightly check-ins to keep people abreast about the latest and greatest thinking, like whether the Team All-Star Celebration of the Century is still on the docket for August.
Support connections being made. Many organizations have creatively risen to the challenge of staying connected in a 100% virtual reality. Support the evening bonfire that Yolanda organized to get everyone together. Support the Slack chatter that keeps people laughing. Support the silly awards for the worst hair and saddest home office. You get the idea.
Revisit expectations. If you’re still holding people accountable to the budgets and expectations from a pre-COVID reality, you need to know that you are freaking your team out. What do the expectations look like in this new reality? And what will they look like next week because things are ever-changing? If you’re looking to dial up the warmth, this is low-hanging fruit for you. Admit that expectations are a moving target and just communicate what you believe is fair for today.
Keep people focused on their expectations and results. This emphasis on turning up the warmth isn’t meant to be at the expense of expecting people to still work hard at meaningful tasks. This is an and situation: make sure people feel fully supported—now more than ever—and encouraged and recognized for doing the work on their plate. Recognition is the perfect technique to reinforce the big job at hand while also providing support.
We’re noticing that some of the best results during this surreal time are coming from leaders who are making the time to let their people know they care. Even Yohan has embraced the warm side of leadership; it’s not natural for him, but we’re not trying to change his personality. He has built-in a hefty, “What’s on your mind?” time for every 1:1 and group meeting. He’s making sure that his fellow leaders are doing the same. He’s socializing the answers to even the toughest questions. He’s even having his kids participate in an art contest that one of his team members initiated to keep the kids at home busy for at least part of the day.
Dialing up the temperature of leadership warmth pays off through improved results, and it also makes you a better human being to be around. Give it a try and let us know if you plan to plot yourself a little more off to the right on the grid, even in a post-COVID reality.